Florence Clears Out, And We're A-OK

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Hey everybody ... it's all good!

After fearing the worst, our brick home in suburban Charlotte stood up against Florence's fury and performed wonderfully.

Not a drop of water inside, and no damage on our lot. There is cleanup to do, but it's not bad. We know we're so, so lucky compared to the death and destruction Florence wrought on other parts of the Carolinas, particularly the coastal areas.

Simmie and I took a walk around the neighborhood a little while ago and it appeared damage was minimal. A few trees fell, but it didn't appear any fell on houses, fences or other expensive structures. This despite our town leading the entire county in rainfall during the 48-hour storm, some 10.7 inches. (We're No. 1!)

There were reports of numerous streets in the metro area closed by flooding, fallen trees, etc., but Robbie got to work just fine this morning -- good thing for the sick kids and families she helps as part of her every workday.

Thanks to the many family and friends who inquired about our situation. It's always nice to know people care.

The only negative was that we didn't lose power ... meaning I had to watch my Panthers lose a tough one to the hated Falcons! Of course, I also got to watch the Patriots lose, so it wasn't all bad!!

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Speaking of football, I happened to catch the end of the Packers-Vikings game and I saw what hopefully will be the worst officiating call of the season.

(Video from Fox TV via YouTube)

Packers linebacker Clay Matthews put a textbook hit on Kirk Cousins just as the Vikings QB was releasing a pass. The ball floated and was intercepted by Green Bay's Jaire Alexander to seemingly clinch the Packers' victory.

But referee Tony Corrente whistled Matthews for roughing the passer, and, given a reprieve, Minnesota went on to tie the game.

Matthews didn't hit Cousins high, didn't hit Cousins low, didn't hit Cousins late, didn't hit Cousins with excessive force, didn't use his helmet to hit Cousins and didn't drive Cousins to the ground.

I am not one to blame officials very often. Heck, I officiate youth baseball and basketball games myself, so I know how difficult it can be. Almost always, a team has chances to overcome even the worst calls, and certainly the Packers could have won this game despite Corrente's flag. 

Still, this was a truly horrible call, and it played a huge role in preventing a deserving team from winning.

As Cousins himself said: 

“I’m sure it was probably a generous call."

Yes, if "generous" is a synonym for brutally bad.
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Flag NFL for ruining the product

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The scab refs just handed a final-play victory to the Seahawks, who beat the Packers thanks to an absolutely awful call on what should have been a game-ending interception.

Were this an aberration, it would have been bad enough. But it keeps happening -- two, four, six, 10 times a game. And now it's happened at the end of a Monday Night Football game, with every intelligent observer (including millions watching at home) knowing what the call should have been.

Roger Goodell, the self-styled Mr. Integrity, and the NFL's skinflint owners should be ashamed of the product they are foisting upon the viewing public -- not to mention the hard-working players and coaches whose livelihoods are being adversely affected by a bunch of gazillionaires who are too cheap to pay relative peanuts to the regular refs.
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Today's High Five - Weekend Edition

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5. Two impressive wins for Ryan Braun and Prince Fielder ... a ridiculous romp for Aaron Rodgers & Co. ... Bucky Badger delivering a most inhospitable welcome to the Big Ten for Nebraska.

'Twas one helluva weekend in Cheezland.

4. Ron Rivera will be a good coach for the Panthers. But really ... shouldn't the former Bears assistant have known better than to kick the football to Devin Hester?

Plain and simple: You do that, you deserve to lose.

3. I am sooooooo glad Dexter, the smartest and most fun show on television, is back.

2. With two outs in the bottom of the ninth inning Sunday, Curtis Granderson, representing the tying run for the Yankees, swung at a Jose Valverde pitch and hit a sky-high foul pop. It appeared the game was over. But with Tigers 3B Brandon Inge standing only a few feet away, catcher Alex Avila slipped on the on-deck circle and fell ... and the ball dropped harmlessly to the ground. Granderson ended up walking, bringing clutch hitter extraordinaire Robinson Cano to the plate as the winning run.

With rain cascading down, Valverde got Cano to hit a routine grounder to 2B -- and Ramon Santiago made the play, ending the game and sending the series to Detroit tied at a game apiece.

Had the Tigers been the Cubs ...

Santiago would have booted Cano's grounder, Valverde would have given up a walk-off double to A-Rod, and both dopey fans and media mopes would have blamed not Inge, Santiago and Valverde but a billy goat, a curse and a fan in the stands.

1. OK, Roger Goodell ... cut the shenanigans and put the real Lions back in the league.

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Choose sides in labor dispute: greedy billionaires or greedy millionaires?

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I rarely feel sorry for pro athletes and I certainly don't feel sorry for Tommie Harris. He entered the NFL as a refreshingly funny and supremely talented defensive lineman but leaves the Bears as a cantankerous, underperforming stiff who was fined and suspended often for acting like a jerk.

Still, the Harris situation underscores why I don't blame NFL players for trying to get the best deal possible in their labor struggle against the owners -- even if it means the game gets shut down for a while.

Unlike athletes in baseball, basketball and hockey, the vast majority of NFL players don't have guaranteed contracts. They do get a large chunk of money upfront, which discourages teams from cutting them early in their contracts, but every time you see something like a six-year, $60 million deal, be aware that it really isn't that.

Harris was cut with a year left on his contract so the Bears could save millions of dollars. Despite having a contract that runs through next season, Harris won't get a dime of his projected 2011 salary.

Moreover, NFL players are much more likely to suffer devastating injuries than their MLB, NBA and NHL counterparts. I'm not just talking about injuries that could shorten their careers, such as the knee blowout that pretty much ruined Harris as a player several years ago. I'm talking about truly devastating injuries that make it difficult for them to live normal lives after their short careers end.

So not only do NFL players have much briefer windows of opportunity to earn big money, they have much better chances at having a lousy quality of life after their careers are finished. And they have "contracts" that can be taken away at any time.

Now, nobody is forcing any football player to be a football player. Don't like the risks? Be a carpenter, rocket scientist or blogger.

Just remember this when choosing sides in the player-owner debate: If the owners don't give the money to the players, they simply pocket it. They certainly aren't going to lower ticket prices. Nor are they going to repay the taxpayers they fleeced for sweet stadium deals.

To be sure, it's not a great choice: greedy millionaire athletes who think they are entitled to riches and fame ... or greedy billionaire owners who are always scheming to make still more money.

Ugh.

Given that choice, though, I usually side with the jocks. They're the ones putting their limbs and life on the line, especially in the NFL.

The owners are only putting their cash on the line, and rich people always seem to find ways to get plenty more of that -- almost always at the expense of hard-working folks like you and me.
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$tep right up, NCAA amateur$!

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The biggest day in professional football is just about here.

No, not the Super Bowl, silly.

National Letter of Intent Day!
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All this ... and the Pro Bowl, too?

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Had a very nice Saturday.

The wife and I joined a couple dozen fellow Charlotte-area Marquette alums to watch our beloved Golden Warrior Eagles beat Syracuse. Then we (not the dozens, just Roberta and I) went to see "Blue Valentine" -- a tad depressing but still very good.

Now I just hope I'll be able to get a good night sleep. I mean, it's hard not to be too excited to rest, what with the Pro Bowl so close to kickoff!
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Icons R Us: From Favre to Kobe to Phil Ivey

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The Bald Truth

Frankly, I didn't pay attention to a single thing Brett Favre said as he talked about getting ready to play his first game in Green Bay since becoming America's most famous vagabond since Jack Kerouac.

It was his tone of voice - almost catatonic, as if he had been awakened from a deep slumber just in time for his midweek press conference - that told me all I needed to know.

He is working so hard to seem low-key, it's obvious he's not. The man is as nervous and anxious as a teenage boy going to his first high-school dance.

Which is perfectly normal. Favre doesn't want to show up for the dance, trip over his own two feet and land face-down in the onion dip. Pretty hard to impress the ladies, the peers and the onlookers that way.

I'm guessing Favre will be received quite well by the folks who spent more than a decade and a half naming their kids Brett.

And he should be. Favre created wonderful memories for those Cheeseheads. He won them a championship. He restored pride in all things Packer. He played hard and with the enthusiasm of a rookie, even when he was old and gray. He never missed an opening coin toss, no matter how crappy he might have felt on a given day. He gave his life and blood for that organization.

Yeah, it ended weirdly. Yeah, in recent years he's been more wishy-washy than John Kerry on a bad day. Yeah, it sucks for Packerland to see Favre in freakin' purple.

But it's all worked out pretty well for the Packers, too. There certainly aren't many QBs better than Aaron Rodgers.

Of course, Favre is approaching Sunday's return with great anticipation. I'm really looking forward to the game, too - and I'm not a Packers fan, not a Vikings fan and, last I looked, not scheduled to play in it.

The Balder Truth

The NBA season has begun, so I'm just a little tardy with my predictions:

The Lakers will beat the Celtics in the NBA Finals.

Kobe will repeat as MVP.

The Spurs will take the Lakers to 7 games in the Western Conference finals.

The Cavaliers will win fewer games with Shaq than they did without him.

LeBron will start shopping for real estate in New York.

The Bulls will increase their win total from 41 to 43 and again will lose in the first round of the playoffs.

Will that convince John Paxson and Jerry Reinsdorf to extend Vinny Del Negro's contract? Only if they are fools.

THE BALDEST TRUTH

Imagine Phil Mickelson turning in a Masters scorecard with the wrong score marked down at No. 12. Or Kevin Garnett shooting at the wrong end and scoring an important basket for the opponent in the NBA Finals. Or Peyton Manning looking right at a wide-open receiver in the end zone and, instead of throwing the ball, taking a knee in the third quarter of the Super Bowl. Or Derek Jeter forgetting how many outs there were in Game 5 of the World Series and throwing the ball into the stands to allow a run to score.

Hello, Phil Ivey.

ESPN The Magazine's latest cover boy as "The Best Poker Player On Earth," Ivey had what should have been a winning flush on Day 8 of the World Series of Poker's Main Event. Instead, he simply threw it away.

I'm not saying he folded because he wasn't sure he could beat his opponent. I'm saying the betting already had ended for the hand and his opponent already had shown his two-pair when Ivey, without taking another look at his two face-down cards, mucked his ace-high spade flush into the discard pile.

Incredible. The best poker player on the planet, playing on the game's biggest stage, simply forgot what he had in his hand.

The mistake cost Ivey more than 2 million chips and was a huge part of his free-fall from near the chip lead to the brink of elimination.

This all took place shortly after a pre-recorded interview in which Ivey spoke of his heightened concentration level and his determination to finally reach the Main Event final table - a destination that has eluded him forever.

It's a tribute to Phil's skill that he was able to recover and qualify for the final table. And it's a lesson - a rather refreshing one, too - that even the masters screw up royally.

Bears obviously determined to avoid another narrow defeat

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The Bald Truth

You know, if a few plays go differently in that game, the Bears only lose by 21.

28, tops.

The List

Five Bears who should be most embarrassed by Sunday's 45-10 loss to the Bengals:

1. Lovie Smith. The head coach - who brazenly promoted himself to defensive coordinator/czar/guru - had to watch helplessly as his heralded gang got bent, folded, mutilated, fooled, befuddled and bamboozled. Bengals offensive coordinator Bob Bratkowski seemed to know exactly what Lovie's lads were going to do on every single play. Lovie's fingerprints were all over this game - and they're all over a 3-3 team that, as usual, has been built to break Bear Country's collective heart.

2 (tie). Every Offensive & Defensive Lineman. We all could see what Jay Cutler and Matt Forte weren't doing for the Bears and what Carson Palmer and Cedric Benson were doing for the Bengals. Really, though, the skill players were relative bit players. The Bengals so dominated both lines of scrimmage it was as if they were playing Walter Payton College Prep instead of Sweetness' former team.

3. Peanut Tillman. All week long, Chad Ochocinco promised he was going to whip Peanut into butter. Then the game came, and No. 85 made Tillman look like No. 2, if you get my drift.

4. Chicago Scribes. Pretty much every voice in the Tribune and Sun-Times, including Mike Royko's ghost, forecast a Bears triumph. The prevailing logic seemed to be: The defense would be all riled up to prove that Benson's been a fluke this year; and Cutler would have a huge day. And these guys are supposed to be experts? Come on! They should be like me and be perfect with every prediction! (Um, the Cubs and White Sox did win their divisions this year, right?)

5. Brad Maynard. Well, not really. But Wanny used to like to blame Todd Sauerbrun when things went bad, so there certainly is precedent for fingering the punter.

The Balder Truth

Here was the Bears' first play from scrimmage in the ...

First Quarter: Defense allows 19-yard pass from Palmer to Ochocinco. (Palmer goes on to throw for 5 TDs, including dos to Ochocinco.)

Second Quarter: Despite a perfectly good snap from Olin Kreutz, Cutler fumbles. (Bears Savior J.C. finishes with 3 interceptions, 2 fumbles and about 30 bruises as his offensive line apparently thought it was supposed to be a night game.)

Third Quarter: Cutler passes to Earl Bennett for a 2-yard loss. (Rough day all around for the Bears' resident Vanderbiltians.)

Fourth Quarter: Benson scores on a 1-yard run. (The ex-Bear formerly known as Sled-ric pounds and scoots his way to 189 yards - and to bragging rights forever.)

So I don't want to hear that the Bears were inconsistent, because they really were paragons of consistency all day long.

The Quote

"Jay Cutler really has not had a chance in this game. Unless they get better up front ... they're gonna struggle. That O-line's gotta improve." - Fox-TV analyst Tim Ryan.

The D-line, as well. Because while Cutler was getting clobbered pretty much every time he dropped back to pass, Palmer had so much time to kill in the Bengals' pocket that he could be seen filing his nails, reading biblical passages and downloading new tunes to his iPod.

Oh, and finding wide-open receivers, too.

THE BALDEST TRUTH

After Benson's TD made it 45-3, I wondered how he was going to celebrate. Would he taunt the defensive players who used to relish hitting him extra hard in practice? Did he have props stored somewhere near the end zone? Would there be an elaborate dance? Would he dive into the stands and whoop it up with fans who love him?

At first, I was mildly disappointed when he simply put the football on the ground, accepted congratulations from teammates and dropped to one knee in prayer.

Soon enough, though, he jumped to his feet and started taking a victory lap around the inside of the stadium. He waved to fans and soaked in the cheers until a teammate stopped him from rubbing it in and acting so unprofessionally.

That teammate, of course, was ...

Chad Ochocinco, Voice of Reason!

Just three more steps and I'm calling you for traveling!

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The Bald Truth

Absolutely thrilled that the NBA and its referees have agreed on a new contract.

It will be nice to hear the players stop whining about the horrible replacement refs so they can get back to whining about the horrible regular refs.

The Balder Truth

With Ozzie Guillen set to do TV work during the World Series, word is that Fox will be using new technology they're calling "double-strength 7-second delay."

THE BALDEST TRUTH

Prediction time: The Vikings will lose in Pittsburgh and the Saints will fall in Miami, leaving only the Broncos and Colts with unbeaten records.

The Broncos have a bye this week. And the Colts have something even better than a bye - a practice game against the Rams.

The bald truth about Cedric Benson

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The Bald Truth

Cedric Benson says that Bears players resented him while he was in Chicago and that Bears honchos badmouthed and blackballed him after he left. Lovie Smith says they didn't. Bengals coach Marvin Lewis, who has benefited from Benson's emergence, says Smith actually spoke up on Benson's behalf. What really happened?

Aside from Benson pissing off the Bears by not inviting any of them on his party boat, that is?

Well, here goes ...

Immediately after the Bears drafted him, Benson played the poor-poor-pitiful-me routine, actually crying because he was ready to prove all the naysayers wrong.

He wasn't all that ready, though, because he held out and missed the start of camp. Then, upon signing, he was arrogant and aloof.

So it was all Benson's fault then? Not exactly.

Thomas Jones, obviously threatened by the presence of a top draft pick at his position, was very popular with the other players and took every opportunity to turn his teammates against Benson. Defensive players relished the opportunity to take extra-hard shots at the cocky Benson during training camp.

Just because Benson is paranoid doesn't mean many of his teammates weren't out to get him.

As for blackballing ...

Because Benson offered not even a sliver of evidence, it's pretty tough to give his charge much credence. He's bitter and has an ax to grind. Of course, the fact that the Bears wasted the fourth-overall draft pick and a lot of money on Benson gave some front-office types motive to do a little blackballing.

We probably never will know the truth about that part of the story. So let's just say that if Benson's Bengals beat the Bears in Cinci this Sunday, he's right. And if he loses, he's wrong.

Sounds fair to me.

For what it's worth, the Bengals say they love Benson, who is the league's third-leading rusher. They praise his work habits and say he's a good guy in the locker room. The Bears probably think that if Benson had been this dedicated way back when, things would have been different for him in Chicago.

In the end, this clearly is one of those deals in which everybody won.

Benson needed to get out of Chicago.

The Bears needed to move on.

The Bengals needed a good tailback.

Benson has helped Cincinnati become one of the NFL's surprise teams.

And Matt Forte has the Bears' running game going in high gear. As long as "reverse" also is considered a gear.

The Balder Truth

One could say that Mike Scioscia pulled his starter too early and that Joe Girardi pulled his starter too late.

Or one could say that the pitchers employed by both ALCS teams should have done better at the jobs they are paid handsomely to do.

Egads! Actually holding zillionaire athletes accountable! Have I lost my mind?

As it turned out, after blowing a 4-0 lead, the Angels rallied for a 7-6 victory over the Yankees, sending the series back to New York for Game 6 ... and making their manager look less stupid.

By the way, we all should be as stupid as Scioscia and Girardi.

THE BALDEST TRUTH

It's so sad to hear that Magic Johnson and Isiah Thomas are having a spat.

I mean, isn't it time for them to kiss (again) and make up?

Urlacher's bald head is unfair advantage in sexy-athlete competition

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The Bald Truth

This e-mail, from the Bulls, was a pleasant diversion from the normal humdrum fare I usually get in my in-box:

VICTORIA'S SECRET NAMES DERRICK ROSE AS

“WHAT’S SEXY NOW CHICAGO” NOMINEE

Model Marisa Miller to present Rose with his nomination Thurs. at the Berto Center

WHO: Derrick Rose, Bulls Guard

Marisa Miller, Model and Victoria's Secret Angel

WHAT: After practice on Thursday, Victoria's Secret Angel Marisa Miller will make a special appearance to present Derrick Rose with his Victoria's Secret “What’s Sexy Now Chicago Athlete” nomination.

Rose will compete for the award against the Bears' Brian Urlacher and the Blackhawks' Patrick Sharp.

To cast your vote and see the full list of Chicago nominees, visit VSChicago.com, celebrating all things sexy in Chicago.

This event is taking place in conjunction with the opening of the new Victoria's Secret flagship store located at 734 N. Michigan Avenue on Thursday.

The List

Five events in which Rose, Urlacher and Sharp will compete as they vie for the "What's Sexy Now Chicago Athlete" honor:

5. Looking sexy in stylish glasses while taking the SAT. (That's a college entrance exam, Derrick, in case you never heard of it.)

4. Most sex leading to children fathered. (Wait ... I think Urlacher has this one clinched.)

3. Swimsuit competition. (No thongs. Please! No! Thongs!)

2. Sexiest pout while demanding a new contract. (Urlacher is the overwhelming favorite because he has so much practice.)

1. Ice-Dancing with the Stars. (Hey, Sharp deserves to have one event he can win.)

The Balder Truth

If it seems strange that 47-year-old Chris Chelios has signed to play in the minors for the Chicago Wolves, just remember this:

He's not even 7 in wolf years.

The Quote

"We're two plays away from being 5-0." - Robbie Gould, Tuesday on WSCR-AM.

Yep. And his Bears are two plays away from being 1-4, too, but we won't talk about those.

3-2 ... that seems just about right for Lovie's Lads.

THE BALDEST TRUTH

Thanks to a new iPhone application costing a mere $4.99, fans of Chad Ochocinco can keep tabs on the Bengals receiver's tweets and such. As a bonus, the AP story says, "They can ask his device on dating or anything else."

Oooh! Oooh! Me first!

"Mr. Ochocinco, is it best to kiss a girl before or after I whisper sweet trash-talk in her ear?"

Yankee fundamentals, Denver duds and baseball math

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The Bald Truth

The Yankees ended up losing an inning later, but there was a play in the bottom of the 10th at Anaheim in which left fielder Johnny Damon backed up Mariano Rivera's errant throw to third base. And as I watched Damon's fundamentally perfect, game-saving play, I said to myself:

"You know, I'm sure Alfonso Soriano would have done the exact same thing."

The List

Three-word descriptions for the Broncos' throwback unis:

5. Butt Freakin' Fuggly.

4. Musta Lost Bet.

3. World Of Mustards.

2. Thift Store Rejects.

1. Baby Has Diarrhea.

The Balder Truth

Jeff Jordan is back ... and just in time for the Illini.

Finally, somebody decent to play quarterback!

Mile High Surprise

What? Balloon Boy was a hoax? The next thing you're gonna tell me is that Kyle Orton's Broncos are 6-0.

THE BALDEST TRUTH

Jonathan Broxton 99 mph heater to the plate + Jimmy Rollins 100 mph laser to right-center field = Phillies 5, Dodgers 4.

See? The new math isn't all that hard to understand.

How many ND fans will be pulling for USC to beat Weis?

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The Bald Truth

Just as some so-called patriotic Republicans are rooting against the president of the United States, will there be self-professed diehard Notre Dame fans rooting against Charlie Weis this Saturday?

As wrong as that seems, Weis has become so despised by a fairly large faction of Fighting Irish faithful that it's possible some Golden Domers would rather see him lose - and lose big - to USC than gain glory by winning.

Notre Dame has won a lot of close games against a lot of not-so-great teams this season, but those count, too. Jimmy Clausen's production down the stretch in those games has helped him climb in stature among the nation's QBs.

Now here comes USC - a team that last lost to Notre Dame two coaches ago and a squad that whipped the Irish by approximately 8 gazillion points the last couple of seasons - for just the kind of home game a coach must win if he wants to be taken seriously.

And if Weis does happen to beat USC, I can't wait to see what he'll do about Afghanistan.

The Balder Truth

And speaking of coaches you can't take seriously ...

Another fine job by Ron Zook. The man's team is all ILL, no ini.

Call me crazy, but when you're six games into your program's fifth season, you should have a pretty good idea who your quarterback is, no?

Hey, let's go easy on the Zooker. He just wants everybody in Illiniland to get excited about hoops season early.

THE BALDEST TRUTH

With convicted dog-abuser Michael Vick coming to town, a Bay Area animal-rights group plans to protest Sunday's Raiders-Eagles game.

These folks believe that if smacking around humans was good enough for Raiders coach Tom Cable, it should have been good enough for Vick, too.

Some real bald baseball predictions

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The Bald Truth

For all those who somehow missed that Wednesday was Bald and Free Day - really; you can look it up! - I, as Grand Pooh-bald, have extended the event through the end of the week.

So now that you have several more days, feel free to hug your favorite bald dude ... or dudette, if Natalie Portman, Sinead O'Connor or Demi Moore happen to be around.

The Balder Truth

Wow, I remember the Rams' Rush Limbaugh Era as if it were just yesterday.

Wait ... it was just yesterday.

THE BALDEST TRUTH

For all the talk about a possible Freeway Series out in La-La-Land, why do I get the feeling we're going to see a Nothing-Free-About-It I-95 Series instead?

Well, because the Yankees and Phillies are better than the Angels and Dodgers, that's why.

Of course, that doesn't always matter. It doesn't take a lot of imagination to see the fundamentally sound, motivated-by-tragedy Angels nibbling CC Sabathia until he weighs only 300 pounds and shutting down A-Roid & Co. Nor does it take much imagination to see Manny being vintage Manny and the good Dodgers pitching making life tough on the Phils.

But I'm not letting my imagination run wild here. I'm going with chalk.

This just feels like the Yankees' year. They have more great players than any other team, and those great players have been playing especially well lately. Yankees in 6.

And as much as I want to see Jim Thome do some DH-ing in the World Series, his Dodgers simply will not be able to keep up with the balanced Philly lineup. I'm going to put a little caveat out here: As long as Brad Lidge isn't terrible, Phillies in 6.

So I guess this means McNabb's not going to St. Louis?

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The Bald Truth

When Rush Limbaugh says he wants to buy half of the Rams, we have to assume he's talking about the white half.

The Balder Truth

Word out of Memphis is that new Grizzlies guard Allen Iverson has a partially torn hamstring. He must have gotten it while partially practicing.

THE BALDEST TRUTH

Jeez, DeRo, nice throw!

Somebody please tell Mark DeRosa he's no longer with the Cubs and therefore is not contractually obligated to choke in the playoffs.

OK, OK ... DeRo also got three hits in the Cards' Game 1 loss to the Dodgers. And that's as many as Alfonso Soriano and Aramis Ramirez combined for when the Cubbies got swept by L.A. last year.

But still ... nice throw, DeRo!

Losers easy to find ... in NFL stadiums & at Chicago ballparks

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The Bald Truth

Just two weeks ago, the Lions were national punchlines. Now, Detroit isn't even close to being the NFL's worst team. I'm not sure if that tells us more about the Lions and the positive changes they've made or about the putrid state of the league's lowest reaches.

Among those the Lions have eclipsed:

Browns: The funniest thing is that they thought Eric Mangini was the answer. Next savior genius on their list: Gotta be Charlie Weis, right?

Bucs: It must be quite a blow to Malcolm Glazer's enormous ego that his squad is, at best, Florida's sixth-best pro football team, behind the Jaguars, Dolphins, Gators, Hurricanes and Seminoles.

Raiders: And speaking of blows and egos ... if only Al Davis would fire himself.

Bills: Another fine Dick Jauron production. A terrible team and an unhappy T.O. Talk about a jackpot!

Panthers: Was Jake Delhomme really a Super Bowl QB once upon a time?

Chiefs: As bad as they are - hint: real bad - they aren't even the worst team in Missouri by a long shot. That honor goes to ...

Rams: Pull Jim Hart and Dan Dierdorf out of their steakhouses and put 'em on the field, and the Rams wouldn't be one lick worse than they are right now. I know I'd bet on a reunion of '75 Cardinals over this crew.

The Balder Truth

The final Cubs play of the season: Geovany Soto swinging through a mediocre fastball. How perfect! The 2008 NL Rookie of the Year finishes a lost season with one last utter failure.

Lou Piniella can blame injuries all he wants, but it was the team's supposed best players' inability to come through over and over and over again that condemned the Cubbies to beginning another century doing what they do best (or worst, as the case may be).

The final White Sox play of the season: Alex Rios grounding into a double play. How perfect! Ken Williams' wild, desperate stab at saving a hopeless season backfires one last time.

One last time in 2009, anyway. The White Sox will be overpaying this guy for years. I'm a big fan of Williams' willingness to aggressively pursue championships - his relentless, masterful Jake Peavy deal will turn out to be a great one as long as the guy stays healthy - but Rios was available for any taker for a reason. Methinks Williams got took.

THE BALDEST TRUTH

It has become clear that only one person could have saved Chicago's Olympic bid.

Why weren't you in Copenhagen, Jay Cutler?

Wouldn't even have cost us taxpayers a dime because J.C. could have walked all the way there!

Metrodome almost gone (for baseball) but not forgotten

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The Bald Truth

Though I will always have a soft spot in my heart for the place, few will mourn the demise of baseball at the Metrodome.

In a recent Sports Illustrated poll, the Twins' soon-to-be-former home was the only ballpark that not a single player chose as his favorite. Billy Martin famously called it "a Chinese ping-pong palace" ... and feeling that didn't adequately capture his distate for the joint, "a bleeping Little League park."

Players hate the white ceiling that makes pop-ups disappear, the Hefty bag that swallows right-fielders whole, the bouncy artificial turf, the speakers that deflect outfield flys and the total lack of charm. Target Field, the new outdoor facility the Twins will move into for next season's opener, promises to feel more like a ballpark and less like a puffy airplane hangar.

Mike Ditka used to call it the "Rollerdome," and said it was more fit for livestock shows than sports. While the Vikings also want a new stadium, the Metrodome actually is a decent football theater. For baseball, though, most seats are angled so poorly it's hard to follow the game.

Having said all that, I'll mostly remember the Dome fondly - and not just because it was an easy place at which to work (a private staircase leads directly from the press box to the clubhouse).

As the Minneapolis AP hack from 1985-94, I witnessed two World Series (the Twins went 8-0 at home and 0-6 on the road), Dave Winfield's 3,000th hit and Scott Erickson's no-hitter.

I saw dozens of amazing plays and huge home runs by the likes of Kirby Puckett, Gary Gaetti and Kent Hrbek. It was a hitter's park, but that didn't stop Frank Viola and Jack Morris from dominating on the mound; I was the Minnesota BBWAA chairman the year after Viola won the Cy Young and got to present him the award during a pregame ceremony.

I was there the time a severe windstorm tore a hole in the roof and was there many, many times when fans raised the roof cheering their heroes.

I've been in this business for three decades and I've never been in a louder arena than the Metrodome after Hrbek's Game 6 grand slam assured there would be a seventh game in the 1987 World Series. Of course, Puckett's amazing catch and subsequent homer in Game 6 of the '91 Series came close.

The Twins will miss having one of the best home-field advantages in all of sports. It was more than the noise factor, as significant as that was. It also was the quirkiness of the place. The Twins knew all the angles; their overwhelmed opponents ... not so much.

Fans will love the new ballpark, but I doubt they'll love having games rained - and snowed! - out. As long as they were committing zillions of dollars to Target Field anyway, why didn't the movers and shakers pony up the extra bucks necessary to give it a retractable roof?

Mostly, shame on skinflint Carl Pohlad, the team's late owner who also happened to be one of the richest men in the universe. Apparently, he must have thought he really could take it all with him.

For 28 years, the Metrodome truly has been a dump of a baseball facility. But the team would have left for Florida or some other sunny state long ago had the place not been built.

Maybe Minnesotans will remember that come next April, when they're sitting at the new ballpark and brushing the snow off of their parkas.

Self-Cubfilling Prophecy?

Here's the third paragraph of the cubs.com story after the Lovable Losers officially were eliminated from the wild-card race a couple days ago:

"It's now 102 years and counting for the Cubs."

Hear that, Cubbieland? Don't bother showing up next season, either!

THE BALDEST TRUTH

Chris Carpenter not only pitched five shutout innings for the Cardinals on Friday, he also hit a grand slam and a two-run double.

Six RBIs!

Kind of reminded me of one of Milton Bradley's better months.

Favre, Lions, Bears win; Tiger only kinda does

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The Bald Truth

Oh, so that's what all the Favre fuss was about.

Break Up ...

The Lions!

The Balder Truth

The one thing I don't want to hear is this team "shoulda won" a game or that team "shoulda lost." It's stupid.

One thing I've learned over the years is that, regardless of the sport, teams usually win the games they shoulda won over the course of a season.

Take the Bears. If you're not a fan, you just might claim that the Bears shoulda lost to Pittsburgh and Seattle. OK, but then do you allow that they shoulda won their opener at Green Bay? Can't have it both ways.

Same with Notre Dame. A relatively weak 3-1 team? Sure. But the Irish no more shoulda lost to Michigan State and Purdue than they shoulda won against Michigan.

At the end of the year, the shouldas balance out quite nicely.

But don't get me started about the postseason. I mean, everybody knows Marquette shoulda made it to the Final Four!

Look Who's All Grown Up ...

Heck of a game for Devin Hester, who reached down to make catches, jumped high to grab the football, ranged right, dove left, scored the winning TD and did everything within his power to make Jay Cutler look good all day.

Hester ... he's not just for punt returns any more.

THE BALDEST TRUTH

Really, how satisfying was the 2009 season for Tiger Woods?

He proved he could return from knee surgery and still be great ... and he won six tournaments ... and he finished in the top 2 in more than half of the 17 events he entered ... and he won the FedEx Cup, the pseudo-playoff championship that might mean more if it weren't completely overshadowed by pro and college football.

Yep, it's been one heck of a year for The Greatest Ever. Still ...

He repeatedly has said he measures success only by number of majors won, and he won as many as you and I did (unless your name is Y.E. Yang, Stewart Cink, Lucas Glover or Angel Cabrera) ... and he missed the cut in the British Open ... and he had the PGA Championship in his grasp until he - gulp! - choked it away ... and he captured the FedEx Cup for the second time in three years despite not winning its premier event, finishing second to archrival Phil Mickelson in the Tour Championship.

"It feels certainly not like it did a couple of years ago when I won the tournament," said Woods, who had to work very hard this time to force a smile when accepting the FedEx trophy.

Hey, the rest of us should have only those kinds of disappointments in our lives, right?

Well, yeah. But then again, the rest of us aren't Tiger Woods.

Leaping to celebrations

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The Lambeau Leap is A-OK, but shouldn't be any more legal a celebration in the NFL's eyes than any of a number of things against which the No Fun League has legislated. For this and other football musings, check out my latest exclusive SportsFanLive post HERE.

Don't blame Milton Bradley for being Milton Bradley

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The Bald Truth

Milton Bradley has some serious emotional problems. He needs help ... and he has the means to afford it.

Strangely, I feel a little sorry for the man. I mean, he can't help it if he's Milton Bradley. That's all he knows how to be. He didn't hold a gun to Cubbie boss Jim Hendry's head to make Hendry sign him (though, admit it, you wouldn't be surprised if he had).

Hendry on Sunday suspended Bradley for the rest of the season, officially admitting he made the kind of mistake that can ruin a season and set a franchise back several years.

Or, in the case of this franchise, several decades.

Several more decades.

The Balder Truth

Full disclosure: While I preferred Adam Dunn or Bobby Abreu to Bradley, I said at the time of the signing that Bradley made some sense because the laid-back Cubbie clubhouse needed a little pizzazz. In fact, I said that if I were a Cubs fan, I'd have been more concerned about Bradley's history of injuries than about his history of mental instability.

Well, I was wrong. Unlike Jim Hendry, however, I am not paid by Chicago National League Ball Club Inc. to be right. That $30 million mistake won't help Hendry - who had a terrible 2008-09 offseason - in the eyes of the team's new ownership. (Hendry's own long-term contract might help him survive at least another season, though.)

In typical Cubbie fashion, Hendry didn't suspend Bradley for being either a bad teammate or a bad ballplayer.

No, the GM suspended Bradley for being himself.

Hendry made the move after Bradley told Daily Herald beat writer Bruce Miles this when asked if he had enjoyed his first season in Cubbieland:

"Not really. It's just not a positive environment. I need a stable, healthy, enjoyable environment. There's too many people everywhere in your face with a microphone asking the same questions repeatedly. Everything is just bashing you. You got out there and you play harder than anybody on the field and never get credit for it. It's just negativity. And you understand why they haven't won in 100 years here, because it's negative."

100 ... 101 ... who am I to quibble about a year here or a century there?

Bradley never got it. He never got that if you're the $30 million newcomer who was supposed to be the final piece of a championship puzzle and you instead drive in fewer runs than Mike Fontenot, you are going to be criticized. Then, when you blame everybody but yourself - over and over and over again - you are going to be disliked.

Obviously, Chicago was a terrible fit for Bradley, who needs to go somewhere fans don't care and where us annoying media types are few and far between.

Then again, they already had him in San Diego, right?

But hey, don't be too hard on the man. Asking Milton Bradley to be somebody other than Milton Bradley is like asking a nun to stop crossing herself or a gerbil to stop nibbling on wood shavings.

Good thing for Milton: Thirty million bucks buys a lot of psychoanalysis.

Really. I'm not kidding.

If he isn't already seeing a shrink, he needs to start. If he is, he needs to find a new one.

THE BALDEST TRUTH

Nice job by Robbie Gould to come through in the clutch for the Bears after:

A. His Steelers counterpart, Jeff Reed, blew two big field-goal attempts and ...

2. His coach, Lovie Smith, risked freezing his own kicker by calling time-out before Gould's winning kick.