Bo-ring!

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The day after the MLB All-Star Game is the worst day in sports.

No major league ballgames. 

NFL training camp hasn't opened yet.

It's offseason for the NBA and NHL (and well after the opening of free agency in those leagues, so there isn't even much news).

Wimbledon is over and The Open Championship hasn't started.

When WNBA games, Brett Favre silliness and speculation about Allen Iverson signing with the Clippers are the day's big-ticket items, well, we might as well have slept in.

The beautiful thing: The siesta is a short one. Even as I write this, Tiger & Friends are mere hours away from teeing it up over the pond. 

Baseball will be back, too, replete with folks talking about their team being only x games out "in the loss column" and y games out of the wild-card lead. (Or, in the case of the Nationals, zzzzz games out of fourth place.)

Soon enough, the All-Star festivities will be but a distant memory ... and humidity will descend upon St. Louis with enough force to curl those porn-star 'staches the Cardinals are growing.

Yes, all will be right with the world.

In the meantime ... hey, how 'bout that Chamique Holdsclaw, huh? With her putting 28 points on the board for the Dream, those lamentable Lynx never had a chance!

This judge plays hardball

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The Bald Truth

Fourteen years ago, a wise federal judge named Sonia Sotomayor wouldn't let Bud Selig, Jerry Reinsdorf and the rest of the grinches who tried to steal baseball use replacement players to start the 1995 season.

Say this for Barack Obama's first Supreme Court nominee: She has displayed concern for the greater good, and she can't be bullied by the whiny, rich yahoos in the old boys' network.

The Balder Truth

Anquan Boldin is firing his agent, Drew Rosenhaus.

Word is, Boldin simply wouldn't do situps in his driveway.

Said Rosenhaus: "Next question!"

THE BALDEST TRUTH

Heads are about to roll in the NBA, where far too many people apparently didn't get David Stern's Kobe-and-LeBron-in-the-Finals memo.

Magic vs. Nuggets, anybody?

I mean, is it possible for a series to generate negative TV ratings?

Best of Pax, worst of Pax

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The List I

John Paxson's Greatest Hits as Bulls GM, the job he has handed over to former assistant Gar Forman:

5. Getting the Knicks to take Eddy Curry - headband, saggy shorts, lack of work ethic and all.

4. Acquiring Brad Miller and John Salmons before the 2009 trading deadline. The Bulls wouldn't have made the playoffs without those two solid professionals. Hell, they might not have made it to March.

3. Hiring Scott Skiles as coach. You knew the players eventually would tune him out, but Skiles was the exact kind of demanding taskmaster a lazy, underachieving group of knuckleheads needed.

2. Crossing his fingers and toes, knocking on wood, rubbing his rabbit's foot, not stepping on cracks and whatever else he did to land Derrick Rose in the 2008 draft lottery.

1. Cleaning up the mess left behind by Jerry Krause. Most notably, convincing Jerry Reinsdorf to eat Eddie Robinson's eight-figure contract. This is the sports equivalent to brokering peace in the Middle East.

The List II

Pax's Greatest Misses:

5. Dumping J.R. Smith about 10 seconds after acquiring him in the trade that sent Tyson Chandler to New Orleans. Smith has gone on to be an outstanding player for a Nuggets team that has gone farther in the playoffs than the post-Jordan Bulls ever have. But hey, at least Pax got the great Howard Eisley in return.

4. Signing Ben Wallace, allegely the final piece of their championship puzzle. I'm proud that I was one of the few Chicago media types who didn't swoon the day the deal was made. (At the time, I heard much screaming from the masses about my negative attitude.) Wallace turned out to be a cancer who poisoned the locker room and openly pined for his former Pistons teammates. Making the whole scene even more absurd: The Bulls refused to relax their ridiculous no-headband rule for this supposed savior, who had been wearing a headband for years.

3. Hiring Vinny Del Negro as coach. There were far, far, far better choices out there - and there still are. The Bulls will need to hire one of them if they are to win anything.

2. Drafting Tyrus Thomas in 2006. Pax, who should have known better, fell in love with the athlete instead of selecting the guy I begged him to take, Brandon Roy. The latter already is a superstar; the former never will be more than an unreliable role player. But boy, it sure is fun watching Tyrus' 10 highlight dunks and 5 highlight blocks a year.

1. Failing to draft Dwyane Wade in 2003. Had Pax agreed to include Donyell Marshall in a deal with Toronto, they would have been in position to take one of the NBA's three best players. Instead, Pax kept Marshall (for a little while, anyway) and settled for Kirk Hinrich. How's that working for the Bulls so far?

Lights ... camera ... Blackhawks!

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The Bald Truth

This is going to have to be short and quick because I'm exhausted after watching the Blackhawks advance to the Western Conference finals with Monday's wild 7-5 win over the Canucks at the United Center.

The last time a large gathering of hockey players scored that often and quickly, Elisha Cuthbert was in the room.

Anyway, congrats to the young Blackhawks, the rare Chicago sports franchise that actually wins in the postseason these days.

Oh, Goodie ...

Now everybody who once stepped foot within a 300-mile radius of Chicago can claim to be a lifelong Blackhawks fan.

The Balder Truth

According to one report, Mark Cuban told Kenyon Martin's mom that the Nuggets player is a "thug." According to another, the mouthy Mavs owner called Martin a "punk."

Semantics, semantics.

According to my sources, Cuban actually called Martin a "fine young gentleman."

There. Am I back in the will, Uncle Mark?

THE BALDEST TRUTH

Hey, Jose Contreras, you left some massive, formless object behind in Chicago.

Oh wait. That's Bartolo Colon. Never mind.