If only they had Jay Cutler, too

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Losing 11-0 to the worst team in the league with your ace on the mound ... and getting three hits against a dude with a 6.23 ERA.

Thank goodness Jake Peavy is ready to save the day for the White Sox!

Da Hypocrite

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The Bald Truth

From the Do As I Say Dept., we bring you these words of wisdom in the L.A. Times from Da Coach, who was asked about the Vikings' wooing of Brett Favre:

"What's the message folks up there are sending their quarterbacks? 'You're not good enough. I'm going to bring in somebody better than you.' Come on. I'm not really sure I understand it, but then again, that's me. You build from within."

So says the guy who benched everybody for Doug Flutie.

The Quote

"I didn’t kill nobody, I didn’t rape nobody, so that’s it, I’m just going to come and play the game." - Manny Ramirez, in his first interview with reporters since being suspended for getting caught with his hand in the steroid jar.

Predictably, some people have their undies in a bundle over Ramirez's choice of words. They are accusing him of downplaying the seriousness of murder and rape.

If they actually read and think about his words instead of having knee-jerk reactions, they might realize that Ramirez was saying murder and rape are serious, horrible acts - much worse than, say, taking performance-enhancing drugs.

These days, the only times I really get outraged is when knee-jerk yahoos get outraged about crapola like this.

THE BALDEST TRUTH

Was it only three weeks ago that the White Sox thought they had won the Jake Peavy Sweepstakes?

Well, if they keep losing at the rate they're losing, they'll be sellers instead of buyers by month's end.

It's gotten so bad that Ozzie Guillen and his troops are talking about how satisfied they are after well-played losses.

Way to shoot for the basement, boys!

Oh, does Peavy pitch, too?

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The Bald Truth

The obvious story line from Friday's Cubs-Padres game was that Jake Peavy showed the Cubs just what they were missing.

Yeah ... he got a hit and scored a run.

The Question

OK, who stole the Cardinals' starting pitchers and replaced them with the 1970 Orioles' rotation?

The Baldest Truth

If you're like me, you're shocked - shocked! - to see Rich Harden go on the DL.

He's batting .200, so the Cubs desperately will miss him. 

The Quote

"That's just a great shot, man." - LeBron James, on TNT, describing his buzzer-beating Game 2 winner.

That's just great humility, too.

THE BALDEST TRUTH

The Cavs blew a 23-point lead but won anyway to save themselves from almost certain doom.

The Blackhawks blew a three-goal lead but won anyway to save themselves from almost certain doom.

The Nationals, as usual, simply blew. They faced certain doom before pitchers and catchers reported.

And now we send it to Stormy Mist for the weather ...

Rough day for Peav-ed off White Sox

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The Bald Truth

Jake Peavy, who allegedly was so in love with the idea of pitching on Chicago's North Side that he was heard singing "Go Cubs Go" when he thought he was traded to the Cubbies in December, told the White Sox on Thursday that he had absolutely no interest in being a South Sider.

That's more than your standard, garden-variety rejection, boys. That's like getting told you're too ugly to date Roseanne Barr.  

I mean the only way Thursday could have gone any worse for the White Sox would have been if ... I don't know ... they also lost at home to the hated Twinkies by a ridiculous score like 20-1 or something.

Thankfully, at least nothing like that happened.

Thinking Positive

As bad as the White Sox were against the Twins, they still scored only one fewer run Thursday than the Cubs scored in their entire series against the Cardinals.

Riddle Me This

Q: What do the following ballplayers have in common?

Alfns Srian.

Ryan Therit.

Miltn Bradley.

Gevany St.

Mike Fntent.

Aarn Miles.

Reed Jhnsn.

Ksuke Fukudme.

A: They all play for the Chicag Cubs: the team with absolutely no O.

Get it? No O! 

You don't get that kind of hilarity at espn.com, kids.

THE BALDEST TRUTH

Really, can you blame Jake Peavy?

Why would he want to leave the most pitcher-friendly ballpark in baseball to go to the homer haven that is U.S. Comiskular Park?

Why would he want to leave the NL, where he gets to face the pitcher every third inning - not to mention the weak No. 7 and 8 batters on most teams - to pitch against stacked AL lineups that include designated hitters?

He already has all the money he needs. Plus, he knows that if he waits long enough, the crying-poor Padres will be forced to trade him to one of the NL clubs on his preferred list. He is in control.

So why would Peavy agree to join a team that suddenly looks like a non-contender this season, a team that will be be dumping payroll in the offseason?

The big surprise wasn't that Kenny Williams made a valiant effort at landing the best pitcher on the market. This is the guy who has boldly traded for one big-name pitcher after another during his nine years as Sox GM.

David Wells, Todd Ritchie, Billy Koch, Bartolo Colon, Freddy Garcia, Jose Contreras, Javier Vazquez.

Yes, some of those blockbusters ended up being clunkers. But two - the deals for Garcia and Contreras - made the city's only championship of the last nine decades possible. 

Williams has vision and moxie and imagination. Oh, and cajones the size of cantaloupes.

No, the big surprise was that he actually thought Peavy would agree to the deal.

But hey, it was worth a try. As the lottery folks keep telling us, you can't win if you don't play.