Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Do something with your life; take over GE or IBM

Sad because you haven't gotten a decent raise in years? Well, you're in the wrong profession, bucko!

Quit your job this instant and become a major corporate CEO.

Through good times and bad, the gentlemen (and though there are a few ladies, it's mostly a gentleman's club - and a white gentlemen's club, at that) who head the nation's largest companies pay themselves millions upon millions of dollars per year.

2010 was a pretty good year for most companies, so, according to the New York Times, CEO pay rose 12 percent to an average of $9.6 million.

Nine-point-six million? Jeesh! That's almost twice as much as the average Wisconsin teacher made last year. Just ask honorable Wisconsin Governor (and Marquette dropout) Scott Walker!

And the beauty of being a CEO is that even in cruddy years such as 2008, you still get millions and millions of dollars. Sometimes even while your company takes a taxpayer bailout. Don King was so right: Only in America!

So stop being a patsy. Quit your job as a teacher or cop or firefighter or nurse or other unimportant member of society and do something meaningful with your life ... while making a few extra dollars, to boot.

Become a major corporate CEO, people.

I mean, how much simpler could the road to riches be?

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