Today's High 5: From pigskin to politics

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5. On the 40th anniversary season of the undefeated Dolphins, it's cork-popping time again for Larry Csonka, Bob Griese, Don Shula, Nick Buoniconti & Co.: The last unbeaten team, Atlanta, fell to the Saints.

I was pretty sure the Falcons weren't about to go 19-0 when they needed about 10 lucky plays to beat "my" Carolina Panthers a few weeks back.

4. Time again for the annual debate about which college football teams get to play for the mythical national championship.

Wake me when the BCS is over.

3. Haven't posted lately because I've been doing other stuff, some of which I actually get paid for.

2. The college-basketball-on-an-aircraft-carrier experiment already has run its course.

There were supposed to be three such games over the weekend. Marquette vs. Ohio State had to be canceled because the court was too slippery. Georgetown and Florida managed to play a half before condensation on the court prematurely ended the game. And the Syracuse-San Diego State game that was postponed by rain Friday finally was played Sunday despite a broken shot clock, messed-up scoreboards, a defective court and windy conditions that barely made the game resemble basketball.

In all three cases, athletes, coaches and fans traveled a long way only to be disappointed.

I get it. We want to honor veterans and we want to create cool, interesting experiences.

There are ways to do that without putting athletes at danger and making a mockery of the game.

If the NCAA really wants to help those who have served our country, hold these games in large indoor facilities and donate all proceeds to veterans' causes.

1. I just can't get enough of Fox News these days.

It was my main source of Election Night coverage, and I have thoroughly enjoyed watching the Fair & Balanced Network since then. It's funnier than Saturday Night Live ... and its stars are better actors.

As if listening to Dick Morris explaining why he was slightly off on his prediction of a Mitt Romney landslide wasn't enough entertainment, there's been: Karl Rove blaming the Obama campaign for suppressing the vote; Rick Santorum saying the GOP's failing was not being extreme enough on social issues; Sean Hannity suddenly deciding Latino-friendly immigration reform would be a good thing; and various bloviators saying Barack Obama retained the presidency due to SuperStorm Sandy, the liberal media's Benghazi coverup, the one Black Panther who stood outside one polling place, broken voting machines, etc., etc., etc.

You know, maybe if the Republicans had put up a candidate who could carry the state where he was governor, the state where his dad was a popular governor, the state where he has his newest mansion and the state his running mate calls home, the election wouldn't have come down to conspiracies.

It's been quite an election season. I miss the fun GOP primaries. I miss crazy Michele "Vaccines Make Retards" Bachmann, Herman "9-9-9" Cain, Rick "Oops" Perry, Rick "What A Snob!" Santorum, Newt "Moon Colony" Gingrich and the rest of the gang.

Mitt Romney? I already don't miss him. 

The Best Liar Money Could Buy was a terrible candidate and he would have been a terrible president.

To this day, I can see why sane people would have voted against the very flawed Obama ... but I cannot for the life of me see why anybody not named Romney would have been excited to vote for Mitt, a man who believes in nothing and everything all at the same time.
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Winning legacy assured, Phil Jackson goes out a big loser

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Were Phil Jackson a lesser coach with a thinner resume, he might not have had the chance to retire after his team's showing in the NBA playoffs. He might have been fired at the final buzzer of his final game.

His Lakers had the look of an unprepared, out-of-control, uncoachable group of quitters and thugs.

Knowing Jackson as well as I do, it's hard to believe he mailed it in for Game 4 of the Dallas series. Having said that, what evidence was there that the Lakers were coached at all before or during that game?

It wasn't bad enough that they played with no heart? They also had to take cheap shots at the Mavericks, who deserve to be healthy going into the Western Conference finals?

If David Stern is as tough a commissioner as he claims to be, he will suspend Andrew Bynum for next season's first 20 games and Lamar Odom for at least 5. (If there is a next season, that is.)

As for Jackson, his legacy already was secure well before this debacle. He is the best coach I ever covered, better than anybody I've seen at getting selfish, spoiled millionaires to buy into a team concept. Yes, he was lucky enough to coach some of the greatest basketball players ever. That he turned that talent into 11 titles remains a remarkable achievement.

High schools, colleges and the NBA are filled with good X-and-O strategists. The best coaches are wizards at managing oversized egos. Nobody in the history of sports was better at it than Phil Jackson.

It's a shame he had to go out looking like a powerless loser.
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Hall Call: Worm 5, Reggie 0

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Interesting that Dennis Rodman was chosen as a hoops Hall of Fame finalist but Reggie Miller wasn't. I'm not sure which guy Michael Jordan disliked more!

Worm undoubtedly is one of the all-time great characters in the history of sports. He gave me two of the best interviews I had as a journalist, so there's a soft spot in my heart for the dude.

Rodman's personality was so large it's easy to forget that he probably was the best pound-for-pound rebounder in basketball history. Phil Jackson used to say Rodman was one of the smartest offensive and defensive players he's ever coached, too. Throw in his major role for five championship teams -- five more than Miller won -- and it's pretty much impossible to exclude him, no?

Then again, none of it really matters if Tex Winter doesn't finally get in. Given all he has accomplished, they might as well not even have a Hall of Fame if it doesn't include the architect of the triple-post offense.
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How 'bout that? Bulls actually hire legit coach

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As I wrote two years ago - the last time the Bulls had a coaching search - they waited so long that they might as well have held off a little longer to hire Tom Thibodeau, the best assistant available. Instead, they hired Vinny Del Snooze and then gave him no chance to succeed.

Well, the Bulls got it right this time.

I got to know Thibodeau two decades ago when he was a young assistant for the expansion Timberwolves under Bill Musselman. Even back then, he was prepared and hard-working and had a nice feel for the nuances of the game. He has served under several top coaches since then and has been an instrumental asset for Celtics coach Doc Rivers these last few years.

As they prepared to fire Del Negro, Bulls honchos intimated that they wanted their next coach to have significant NBA head-coaching experience. It's good that they changed their minds. Why limit the pool? Just because Vinny had never coached so much as fourth-grade girls basketball, it didn't mean they had to go to the opposite extreme and exhume Red Auerbach's body.

I mean, Phil Jackson had been "only" an assistant before he became the Bulls' coach, and that turned out pretty well.

It took the Bullish braintrust a ridiculous amount of time - 2 freakin' years - to find their man, but find him they did.

I guess the saying is right: Even a blind squirrel occasionally finds a nut.

Bullish on Jax, less so on Pax

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Let's take a look at the Dynastic Bull Scorecard, shall we?

10 - Phil Jackson, already with 10 NBA titles as a coach and 2 as a player, is closing in on the baker's dozen.

9 - Steve Kerr's Suns finally beat those dastardly Spurs and advanced to the Western Conference finals.

8 - B.J. Armstrong became an agent and quickly landed Derrick Rose as a client. Last month, B.J. sold his Highland Park mansion to new Bears savior Julius Peppers. Ca-ching, ca-ching, ca-ching!

7 - Scottie Pippen soon will be enshrined in the Hall of Fame.

6 - Bill Cartwright, cast aside by "buddy" John Paxson 7 years ago, is an assistant coach for the high-flying Suns.

5 - Michael Jordan's Bobcats scrapped their way into the playoffs but promptly got swept out.

4 - Luc Longley is a rich, happy, 7-foot surfer dude in Australia, mate.

3 - Bill Wennington is the only coherent member of the ex-Bulls big men announcer troika that also includes Stacey King and Dickey Simpkins.

2 - Dennis Rodman occasionally still finds some dupe to give him money just for being That Wacky Old Worm. When he's not being hauled off to jail for copping a feel at some Vegas bar, that is.

1 - Jerry Krause has been hired as an international scout by the White Sox and, sources say, is closing in on Dominican baseball's Dragan Tarlac.

0 - John Paxson turned the Bulls into laughingstocks, went into hiding and then crawled out from under his rock just long enough to make a martyr out of Vinny Del Negro.