Nobody is easier to hate than A-Roid

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First Down

Alex Rodriguez says the last year has been a "nightmare." Poor, poor, pitiful him. I mean, could there be a less-sympathetic figure in sports than A-Roid?

Barry Bonds and Pete Rose look freakin' noble compared to this guy.

I'd rather root for Mike Tyson or Bill Belichick.

Why should anybody believe A-Rod didn't juice when he was a young player in Seattle? Because he says so? That's a good one! If he handed me a quarter, I'd assume it was counterfeit.

Second Down

I am seriously pissed at Time Warner Cable for denying me Showtime -- and the last few episodes of Dexter.

We'll all have the last laugh when cable companies are completely unnecessary, a time that is coming sooner than TWC and its brethren think.

Third Down

In his most recent "Real Time," Bill Maher used his main "New Rule" to rip the North Carolina GOP for its unapologetic, mean-spirited return of the state to the 1950s -- when blacks, Latinos and women knew their place (and knew it wasn't North Carolina).

And to think, I hated Chicago politics.

Fourth Down

Went into my local Costco the other day and they had a table with large, framed, autographed photos of NFL stars. The guy featured most prominently:

Tim Tebow.

In a Jets uniform.

No punchline. None necessary.
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He's No. 6!

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The Bald Truth

Before Jay Cutler came along, the last Bear to wear No. 6 was Kevin Butler back in 1995. Just wait until 14 years after Cutler retires and the Bears give No. 6 to some guy named Dutler.

The Quote

"That doesn't really involve what we've gotta do in America to fix America, so it's a mute point." - Joe "The Plumber" Wurzelbacher, during an appearance on Bill Maher's HBO show.

The Old Quote Revisited

"I said I wasn’t gonna answer any more about Soriano. That’s a mute story." - Lou Piniella, getting perturbed last year when a reporter asked him about Alfonso Soriano.

The Conclusion

You know, come to think of it, I've never seen Joe The Plumber and Lou The Skipper in the same place at the same time.

The List

Five Cutler-trade-related e-mail observations from Gene Chamberlain (the former Bears beat reporter who worked with me when we were both with the Copley Newspaper group):

1. Hell froze over and pigs grew wings.

2. And for some reason, I think they'll still find a way to go 8-8 next season. They can blame it on Turner or injuries or Lovie. Or Riggleman.

3. The Bears traded a first-rounder for a QB who grew up in Indiana and was a Bears fan and got off to a great start in his career ... Rick Mirer.

4. At least this time when they traded for the QB who grew up in Indiana, they didn't make everybody go downtown for a press conference so we could watch Dave Wannstedt drink light beer with ice in it.

5. When the pressure was on last season, Cutler played the same way for Denver that Kyle Orton played for the Bears when the pressure was on. He sucked.

THE BALDEST TRUTH

When Mike Krzyzewski was talking about that very clever Risky Business Guitar Hero ad he filmed with Bobby Knight, Rick Pitino and Roy Williams, he made a reference to "Rick, Roy and Coach Knight."

Really? Is one of the great coaches ever so afraid of insulting Bobby that he feels he must kiss Bobby's ring at every opportunity? Pretty freakin' sad.