Monday, October 4, 2010

Smokeless Bears, meet smoking Reds

The Bald Truth

Funny thing about smoke & mirrors ...

Smoke eventually gets blown away and mirrors are proven to distort reality.

The Bears painfully learned this lesson Sunday night, when a team nowhere near as good as its 3-0 record was folded, spindled and mutilated by a mediocre Giants squad.

In sports, as in real life, reality often is no stinkin' fun at all.

The Balder Truth

Jay Cutler's concussion was caused by none other than ... Jay Cutler.

As NBC's Cris Collinsworth pointed out, Cutler repeatedly held onto the football too long and repeatedly failed to locate the "hot" receiver every time the Giants blitzed. So Cutler repeatedly got clobbered by the Giants, who by halftime knocked him out of the game.

All of which underscores why Collinsworth is the most astute football analyst on TV and why Cutler hasn't even been close to a .500 QB during his overrated, overpaid career.


It will be impossible to top the Great Cincinnati Smoke-Out as the Most Stupiderest Sports Story of 2010.

Seems a few Cincinnatians with Skyline Chili for brains actually complained to the state of Ohio because Reds players lit up victory cigars in the clubhouse after the team clinched its first division title in 15 years.

And now the state will use taxpayer money to investigate the situation.

Hey, nobody loves anti-smoking bans more than I do. It's wonderful to go to a restaurant or to attend a concert at a club without coming home smelling like an ashtray.

But really? A few victory cigars in a champagne-soaked, celebratory clubhouse? This is the fight these yahoos want to wage?

Warning to Reds players: Don't fist-bump any young fans, lest you be charged with child abuse.

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