Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Fly the friendly skies with knives ... but drop that hair gel!

My favorite story this week is that the TSA has changed rules to allow pocket knives, ski poles (yes, the ones with the sharp points on the ends), pool cues and hockey sticks.

"Frankly, I don't want TSA agents to be delayed by these," TSA administrator John Pistole tells Bloomberg News.

Absolutely, because the requirements that we remove our shoes and take our laptop computers out of their cases cause no delay at all. Besides, I'd hate to see anybody clubbed over the head with a Macbook.

As for the knives and various sporting sticks, agency spokesman David Castelveter says: "These are popular items we see regularly. They don't present a risk."

Of course not. One look at the typical NHL player's face proves that hockey sticks are completely incapable of inflicting damage. Those guys didn't want teeth, anyway.

Leave it to flight attendants to be sticks in the mud, claiming that the changes will endanger passengers and employees.


It's not as if the TSA is allowing passengers to bring truly lethal weapons such as Dasani, Head & Shoulders and Skippy through security!

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