Here's Milton Bradley's excuse for being so rank

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The Bald Truth

Well, it took until the end of August, but Milton Bradley finally pulled out the Oldie-But-Goodie Excuse for why it took him months to start hitting even a little bit:

"Strange as it may seem, people don't understand, you play baseball your whole life for teams that play mostly night games. You're getting up at 2 in the afternoon. Here, you've got to get up at 8 o'clock in the morning, come here and get ready. It's an adjustment for your body to get revved up. That's the only thing I can attribute it to because I've done everything else the same."

Never mind that Bradley actually is batting .303 in 44 day games vs. .232 in 63 night games and that he has higher slugging and on-base averages under the sun, too.

And that he is batting .317 with 8 HR and 25 RBI in 50 games at Wrigley Field - where he has to constantly adjust from day to night and back again - vs. .208, 3 and 10 on the road.

And that Jake Fox also is in his first year with the Cubs and has only one fewer RBI than Bradley's 35 in far fewer than half as many plate appearances - and for far less financial compensation.

Sooner or later, every North Sider who fails eventually trots out the "Cubs play too many day games" excuse.

So, at least in that respect, Bradley isn't a disappointment.

THE BALDEST TRUTH

It's especially amazing that, five months into the season, a $30 million (alleged) run-producer has a grand total of 35 RBI.

That ranks Bradley tied for 207th in Major League Baseball.

He's behind slap-hitting leadoff guys, strikeout-prone sluggers, players who have missed half the year with injuries, way-past-their-prime former stars, first-year kids who didn't get called up until well after the season began, each sibling in brother duos, sons of ex-ballplayers, two dudes named Ian (and another named Iannetta, which I believe is Italian for Little Ian), Jewish ballplayers, and, well, a bunch of guys I didn't even know existed until I did the research.

And now, for your viewing pleasure, here are the 206 players with more RBI through Friday's games than Milton "Everybody's Picking On Me" Bradley:

Prince Fielder ... Ryan Howard ... Albert Pujols ... Mark Teixeira ... Justin Morneau ... Ryan Braun ... Carlos Pena ... Jason Bay ... Adam Dunn ... Evan Longoria ... Ryan Zimmerman ... Andre Ethier ... Derrek Lee ... Mark Reynolds ... Nick Markakis ... Victor Martinez ... Kendry Morales ... Hanley Ramirez ... Bobby Abreu ... Miguel Cabrera ...

Also ...

Aaron Hill ... Chase Utley ... Carlos Lee ... Matt Kemp ... Adam Lind ... Raul Ibanez ... Ryan Ludwick ... Jayson Werth ... Jose Lopez ... Joe Mauer ... David Ortiz ... Brandon Phillips ... Adrian Gonzalez ... Russell Branyan ... Paul Konerko ... Brad Hawpe ... Kevin Kouzmanoff ... James Loney ... Jim Thome ... Kevin Youkilis ...

Also ...

Aubrey Huff ... Ian Kinsler ... Pablo Sandoval ... Jason Kubel ... Brian McCann ... Juan Rivera ... Jorge Cantu ... Jermaine Dye ... Hideki Matsui ... Casey Blake ... Shin-Soo Choo ... Torii Hunter ... Adam Jones ... Troy Tulowitzki ... Todd Helton ... Cody Ross ... Miguel Tejada ... Ben Zobrist ... Johnny Damon ... Alex Rodriguez ...

Also ...

Clint Barmes ... Billy Butler ... Brandon Inge ... Bengie Molina ... Jhonny Peralta ... Nick Swisher ... Dan Uggla ... Justin Upton ... Marlon Byrd ... Michael Young ... Robinson Cano ... Mike Lowell ... Alex Rios ... Joey Votto ... Michael Cuddyer ... Pedro Feliz ... Jorge Posada ... Yunel Escobar... Grady Sizemore ... Lance Berkman ...

Also ...

David DeJesus ... John Francoeur ... Nelson Cruz ... Brian Roberts ... Jimmy Rollins ... Luke Scott ... Carl Crawford ... Derek Jeter ... Ian Stewart ... Kurt Suzuki ... Jason Bartlett ... Adam LaRoche ... Hank Blalock ... Jack Cust ... Curtis Granderson ... Orlando Hudson ... Hunter Pence ... Alexei Ramirez ... Josh Willingham ... Mike Cameron ...

Also ...

Nate McLouth ... Dustin Pedroia ... Asdrubal Cabrera ... Chipper Jones ... Placido Polanco ... Marco Scutaro ... Shane Victorino ... David Wright ... Orlando Cabrera ... Scott Drew ... Matt Holliday ... Rod Barajas ... Franklin Gutierrez ... Aaron Rowand ... J.D. Drew ... Maicer Izturis... Alfonso Soriano ... Denard Span ... Vernon Wells ... Elijah Dukes ...

Also ...

Lyle Overbay ... Pat Burrell ... Mark DeRosa ... Nick Johnson ... Erick Aybar ... Chris Iannetta... Melky Cabrera ... Joe Crede ... Mike Jacobs ... Howie Kendrick ... Mike Napoli ... Gerardo Parra ... Ryan Theriot ... Garrett Anderson ... Gordon Beckham ... Alberto Callaspo ... Kosuke Fukudome ... Jeremy Hermida ... Adam Kennedy ... Jason Varitek ...

Also ...

Cristian Guzman ... Chase Headley ... Miguel Olivo ... Manny Ramirez ... Randy Winn ... Geoff Blum ... Jacoby Ellsbury ... Chone Figgins ... J.J. Hardy ... Miguel Montero ... Daniel Murphy ... Ryan Spilborghs ... Mark Ellis ... Andy LaRoche ... Felipe Lopez ... Ken Griffey Jr. ... Josh Hamilton ... Yadier Molina ... Aramis Ramirez ... Scott Rolen ...

Also ...

Gary Sheffield ... Mark Teahen ... Edgar Renteria ... Delmon Young ... Jay Bruce ... Matt Diaz ... David Eckstein ... Andruw Jones ... Casey Kotchman ... Colby Rasmus ... Carlos Beltran ... Jason Giambi ... Jose Guillen ... Corey Hart ... Gary Matthews Jr. ... Scott Podsednik ... B.J. Upton ... Garrett Atkins ... John Baker ... Ryan Church ...

Also ...

Ryan Garko ... Andrew McCutchen ... Casey McGehee ... Nyjer Morgan ... Nolan Reimold ... Freddy Sanchez ... Jonny Gomes ... Travis Hafner ... Russell Martin ... Magglio Ordonez ... A.J. Pierzynski ... Martin Prado ... Yuniesky Betancourt ... Mike Fontenot ... David Murphy ... Laynce Nix ... Delwyn Young ... Chris Coghlan ... Chris Davis ... Rafael Furcal ... Ramon Hernandez ... Seth Smith ... Ichiro Suzuki ... Fernando Tatis ... Adam Everett.

Whew!

Reminder

And if you haven't done so already, please check out my Bradley-centric SportsFanLive edition of The Baldest Truth by clicking HERE.